Before I got married, I am so active in our church activities and I am so sincere in praying and reading the Words of God, the Bible. I even encourage many youths to serve God with sincerity and maturity. I even become an organizer and speaker of youths event in our church. And becoming an effective leader is one of my desires.
Suddenly, after I got married, many things have changed, especially when I got pregnant with our first baby. All my church activities and personal spiritual routines have changed. My spiritual goals have torn down into pieces. And it seems I had forgotten all that I have learned from God’s Kingdom.
The change in my life is a big factor that affects my relationship with God. I did not handle it properly which leads me to get separated from God. But in my heart, I feel so lost and wanted to come back to Him.
And as a result, it seems I forgot being a true Christian. I admit, I even forget how to pray, and how to read the Bible. Also, the things that I used to teach the youth.
So in short, everything in my spiritual life reverses. If before, I am the one who encourages people, now, I am the one they are encouraging.
Thinking of what I have become after my marriage, my heart is in great sadness. But one thing remains in me. It is my faith in God.
I want to take Roman 8:28 for this experience. For there is always a purpose for everything. There is a purpose why I have experienced a separation from God, and I am so grateful to pass that test of my life.
Even how worst I have become, I have discovered that God wants me to feel having the longingness to Him. And so, even my mind forget that He is the one I need, my heart still remembers God.
In this new journey, I want to share with you the 7 signs that your soul is longing for God’s presence.
1.You Will Feel Being Purposeless
In my experience, I felt so purposeless when I am not anymore involved in church activities. Because of so many limitations when you are already married and got pregnant, you cannot do what you want right? For the reason that you have to consider already your spouse’s decision and the baby’s sake.
So at that time, I feel being useless in the Kingdom of God. But recently, God made me realize that I am just longing to serve Him through the church. That doesn’t mean I have no purpose. He leads me to other ways of serving Him in a very simple way.
Being in His presence is not limited in doing our purpose in life but we have to do His purpose in our present situation.
At the moment, I am doing this website as one of my ways of service to God, to share His Goodness to all who can read this.
2.You are Being Thirsty for God’s Messages.
There was a time, I want to hear the voice of God, through youtube videos, hearing podcasts. I even want to join prayer meetings, Bible studies and hearing Godly advice from a friend. But I don’t understand, myself is stopping me in doing those things. It seems that I want to drink, but I can’t drink.
That was the feeling of it. Maybe because of the limitations that the enemy is putting to my mind that is why I can’t do Godly things. But I know, deep in my heart and soul, that I am thirsty to God’s messages. I just have to overcome it.
3.It Seems That You Can Do Anything.
This is what you think when you are really separated into God’s presence. You seem to tell yourself that you can do nothing about something you know you can but are too lazy to do it.
Just like when I knew that somebody needs help from me, I told that person, “I can do nothing for you, sorry. “
Instead of saying, “Ok, I will pray for you about your problem”
You may ask me if I really do that?
Yes, I just did. But when I remember that, I always ask forgiveness from God. Because I know, it is so so so wrong.
4.You Feel So Shy To Pray To God.
Did you ever feel that you want to pray but you seem so shy to Him, and it ends up you just go to sleep?
Well, that is one sign that you are longing for God.
Of course, I know that feeling. If you feel that way, I feel you.
There was this time that I have a problem, then, instead of praying for it, I just made my own way to solve it because I am shy to God. And just let things be.
So as a result of my shyness, it leads me to have pride to do it by my own selfish way.
5.You Read The Bible But You Don’t Understand It
Because I keep my faith in God, I am still attempting to read the Bible but I don’t understand what I am reading.
I got to use to get a message from God through His Word before, but when I got separated from God’s presence, I don’t understand any of it. So as the days pass by, I stopped reading the Bible.
But I never give up on seeking God’s presence through reading his Word. I still attempt to open my Bible, hoping to understand God’s message
6.You Go to Church But You Understand Nothing
That is one of my struggles now as a mother having a baby going to church. I cannot concentrate on listening to the Word of God through the preacher. Because of the reason that I have to give attention to my baby when she cries.
But God knows that I want to hear his Word. You know what, I miss sitting down and taking down notes while listening to God’s Word.
7.You Seem To Carry The World.
Problems are everywhere, but we do always have the choice of how to deal with it. We can choose to carry it or just let God help us to solve it. (Matthew 11:28)
When I don’t feel God’s presence, I always choose to carry all my burdens. And always trying to solve it in my own way. I seek other people’s opinions about it and never come to God to ask for help.
I cannot even smile because of the heaviness I feel. I got angry at my husband and I always find someone who made the mistakes without seeing my own mistake.
Well, that’s it! Those are the 7 signs I have experienced which made me realize I am longing for God’s presence.
I hope these 7 signs I have discovered myself help you realize that you are longing for God’s presence too.
You can also comment on what you have experience and I would love to know about it.